Sunday, 21 October 2018

Wrestler Movies: Kevin Nash - a Life in Film




Big Sexy. Big Daddy Cool Diesel. Oz. Call him what you will but there is no denying Kevin Nash has been one of the biggest and most influential names in professional wrestling over the last 20 years.

Some people love his straight-forward honesty (he was in it for the money and makes no attempt to hide it). He has no qualms about using the 'f' word to describe the wrestling business. Others loathe him for his selfish attitude and cite him as one of the key factors in the demise of WCW.
A controversial figure then. His quads also tear easily.

That's by the by for this blog though as we will be delving into his not particularly glittering film career.


The first point of call is the one most people know about: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: Secret of the Ooze. After the turtles give Shredder a kicking to the sounds of Vanilla Ice, they end up under a dock where Shredder takes the ooze to become 'Super Shredder'. This is where Nash steps in as Shredder gains a foot in height (Nash is a legitimate 6'10"). He bashes some supports until the dock collapses on him. And that's it.


That was in 1991. You have to wait until 2004 to find his next significant film role. He had played a couple background roles in between but nothing of any real note. He had also been smart enough not to get involved in WCW's Ready to Rumble debacle.
He came back in Marvel's The Punisher movie as The Russian. Marvel hadn't quite worked out their movie format yet but this was ok. The Russian is just a big brute who dresses as a 1930's sailor, turns up to kill The Punisher, fails and is killed falling down stairs.


2005 though and Nash is back in the Adam Sandler remake of The Longest Yard (which also featured fellow wrestlers Bill Goldberg, 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin and The Great Khali). It's a chance for Big Sexy to bust his comedy chops. He plays a prison guard who has his steroids replaced with oestrogen pills before the big game. He becomes a lot more effeminate as a result (make of that what you will). To be fair to Nash, he is one of the funnier performers in the movie. On the other hand, this is an Adam Sandler movie so the competition isn't fierce.


Video game movies, they are always good aren't they? Kevin Nash took one on in 2006 when he starred in the adaptation of fighting game, Dead or Alive. His character is an interesting one as Bass Armstrong is clearly based on Nash's friend Hulk Hogan. More specifically, 'Hollywood' Hulk Hogan from the NWO-era of which Nash was a founding member. I guess the real Hogan was unavailable. The Dead or Alive games were chiefly known for their shapely female characters (yes, they were. Don't even try to deny it. Dead or Alive: Beach Volleyball, anyone?) and the film is no different. Nash's role is to get his ass kicked by on-screen daughter Tina, played by Jaime Pressly. It's not a good film, though he takes his beating well.


For the next few years, Nash done some independent movies. Most notably, River of Darkness (oh, we will get to that one day). Couple of background roles. He's done some TV work, appearing in episodes of Sabrina, the Teenage Witch and The Love Boat amongst other things. And nothing else.

What's that? Ok, fine. Kevin Nash is also in both Magic Mike movies. So, if you have a desire to see Nash as a male stripper, there you go. It's quite funny actually because he has no dancing ability...not that I've seen them of course. Oh look, he's done another of his shoot interview things...

Monday, 4 June 2018

FIFA World Cup: Intro Wars - BBC vs ITV, part 3


Part One: http://badmoviehq.blogspot.com/2018/06/fifa-world-cup-intro-wars-bbc-vs-itv.html
Part Two: http://badmoviehq.blogspot.com/2018/06/fifa-world-cup-intro-wars-bbc-vs-itv_3.html


The final part of the ongoing battle between World Cup rivals BBC and ITV.

Germany 2006

ITV:

BBC:


Looking at the two, the title sequence for ITV is possibly better than BBC's but it really lets itself down with its music choice, a cover of  David Bowie's 'Heroes' by Kasabian. The BBC had returned to its artsy roots with shots of German landmarks, ethereal players and Handel's 'See, the Conqueroring Hero Comes!'. No offence to Kasabian but the intro package should really show something to give a flavour of the host nation. As former ITV commentator Andy Townsend would say, 'Not for me, Clive.'

Winner: BBC

Overall: BBC 4-3 ITV

South Africa 2010

ITV:

BBC:


South Africa 2010 and not a vuvuzela in sight. Bliss. This was a damn tough one to call as both organisations 'got it.' This World Cup was more than just South Africa, this World Cup was for all of Africa. After rewatching both several times, I'm going to go with ITV as Vusi Mahlasela's 'When You Come Back' is just a bit more memorable than 'Rainbow Nation' on the BBC. Sing, sing Africa indeed.

Winner: ITV

Overall: BBC 4-4 ITV

Brazil 2014

ITV:

BBC:


Forwarding on four years and the World Cup is back in South America for the first time since 1978 and once more both sides got what the World Cup was about. ITV's effort appears at first glance to be more minimalist. Nice editing on the split screen but not over elaborate. That theme song though, anyone who tells you they didn't go to bed humming 'Bra-zil,..Brazil,..Bra-zillll!' is a liar. BBC's is similar in terms of style but with the usual artsy touches. Steven Gerrard as a plastic figurine is just weird though. Stevie Wonder's 'Another Star' arguably means the BBC effort lacks some authenticity so I have to just about give the edge to ITV.

Winner: ITV

Overall: BBC 4-5 ITV

Russia 2018

BBC:

Obviously, I can't call a winner on this one as ITV haven't revealed their opening sequence yet but the BBC's will likely be based around the above in what the BBC are already calling their 'most ambitious' title sequence ever' involving the creation of a 1200m tapestry which was then animated. ITV will need pull out something special to beat that.

As long as there is a World Cup, a BBC and an ITV this war will continue. ITV may hold the lead for now but who knows what the future may bring.








Sunday, 3 June 2018

FIFA World Cup: Intro Wars - BBC vs ITV, part 2


Part one here: http://badmoviehq.blogspot.com/2018/06/fifa-world-cup-intro-wars-bbc-vs-itv.html

Welcome to the second part of my review of World Cup coverage by Britain's two leading broadcasters (opinions are my own).

USA 94

ITV:

BBC:


The efforts of both companies at Italia '90 were great so inevitably at USA '94 they were both abysmal.
BBC went with the uninspiring choice of 'America' from West Side Story (because it's good to be reminded of how poorly treated immigrants are in America) and ITV went with...what the fuck is that? No, really, what is that? BBC's intro package was bad but ITV found the new circle of Hell with theirs.

Winner: BBC
Overall: BBC 2-2 ITV

France 1998

ITV:

BBC: 


Tough call this one as they are both fine efforts. Do you prefer the more sophisticated, cultured, operatic quality of the Beeb or ITV's Euro-synth-pop vibe? I've got to go with the BBC on this one as the overall presentation of their intro package was just that bit better than ITV's.

Winner: BBC 
Overall: BBC 3-2 ITV

Japan/Korea 2002

ITV: 

BBC:


The first World Cup tournament to be held in Asia (and in two countries), so Oriental vibes were the order of the day. This saw a role reversal from France '98 as the BBC went with 'Tarantula' by dance music royalty Faithless whilst ITV opted for 'Un Bel Di' ('One Fine Day') from the opera Madame Butterfly. I will give this one to ITV because their intro sequence does a better overall job of catching the Far Eastern flavour of the tournament.

Winner: ITV

Overall: BBC 3-3 ITV







Saturday, 2 June 2018

FIFA World Cup: Intro Wars - BBC vs ITV part 1


The 2018 FIFA World Cup in Russia is just 12 days away and excitement is hitting fever pitch.

A bit of a break from the norm on this blog, but with each World Cup it also brings the quadrennial battle between the BBC and ITV to have the best coverage. More specifically, the best theme and intro package. So why not take a look back at some and decide who was the winner?

Spain, 1982

Why start with Spain? No reason, its completely arbitrary but gotta start somewhere.

ITV:


BBC: 

Both are pretty generic but I've got to give the edge to the Beeb for being slightly less generic in its imagery. However, there is no way my inner fanboy is ever going to let Andrew Lloyd Webber have the win over Jeff Wayne so I'm going with ITV.

Winner: ITV
Overall: BBC 0-1 ITV

Mexico 1986

ITV


BBC:

A tough call this one. In terms of presentation, BBC wins hands down with all the Aztec imagery but the music is shite. Over on ITV though, it's hard to look past 'Aztec Gold', that would become the main theme tune for 'Saint and Greavise' until their run ended in 1992. I've got to give ITV the edge on this one too.

Winner: ITV
Overall: BBC 0-2 ITV

Italy 1990

ITV: 


BBC:

No contest on this one. The ITV effort is actually pretty damn good but think of Italia '90 and almost immediately you can see Gazza's tears with Luciano Pavarotti singing 'Nessun Dorma' (translation: 'none shall sleep') over the top. A win for Auntie.

Winner: BBC
Overall: BBC 1-2 ITV